the power of "sulitnya bilang tidak"

was "difficult to say no" it's got incredible power. because it can confuse people, hung a condition, and provide security for a while. but the effect we get, actually very bad. because we have been lied to our hearts sendiri.dan be sure, will not be prosperous and peaceful in that state.
I'm the type who "it is difficult to say no." I always give tolerance to something. This situation always happens to me many years. I feel I've been in a safe position because it has been "pleasing people", without me knowing that I was torturing myself. because it actually happened, I had acted in a comfortable position but in fact I was not comfortable at all ..
from the above chronology, it can be said that I was not assertive type.
what is the meaning of firm?

Definisi 'tegas'

Indonesian to Indonesian

adjective

1. 1 jelas dan terang benar; nyata: tanda-tanda lalu lintas itu tidak berapa -- kelihatan pd malam hari; ia berkata dng suara yg -- dan jelas; 2 tentu dan pasti (tidak ragu-ragu lagi, tidak samar-samar): dng -- permintaan saya ditolaknya; jawablah dng -- , ya atau tidak; 3 tandas: perbuatan kedua orang itu tidak ada sangkut pautnya, -- nya masing-masing berbuat menurut kehendak dan kemauan sendiri; -- bergas tegas dan tangkas; me·ne·gas v meminta keterangan (penjelasan); me·ne·gas·kan v 1 menerangkan; menjelaskan: uraiannya hanya ~ maksud kedatangannya; 2 mengatakan dng tegas (pasti, tentu, tidak ragu-ragu); 3 membenarkan; memastikan: para pejabat yg berwenang belum dapat ~ kebenaran berita itu; per·te·gas·an n 1 pembatasan arti; definisi; 2 penentuan; mem·per·te·gas v menjadikan lebih tegas; pe·ne·gas·an n penjelasan; penentuan: berilah ~ kepadaku, engkau hendak pindah dr sini atau tidak; ke·te·gas·an n kejelasan; kepastian; keterangan yg jelas (pasti)

 

and mario teguhpun advise:
"You are not tegaan, it's hard to say no, and tortured if it should refuse that is not good, in fact was not expressly apply for your own good, that will torment you in regret. Because, not the heart to refuse that is not good, same with the heart to ruin your life itself. And if you up to fail, if they would help you?
It's your life. Solidify. Say no!

let the spirit of the spirit of "we want to disadvantaged or ourselves?